Chump

There was a kid in my school who couldn’t walk properly
Couldn’t talk properly
Or hold a fork properly
With his baby hands
Forever swollen glands
Making crazed demands
And they wobble
Couldn’t cobble a sentence together
He would skip from cars to food to boobs to weather
In one breathe
Failed every reading test
And would lash out if you suggested he was spesh
His hair was a mess
Had orangutan breasts
How he ended up this way was anyone’s guess
Had a nice big house
A well to do family
God only knows how he grew so angry
Pushing his way to the front of the lunch queue
All PE pumps shoved down the loo
Peeing in the pool and turn the water blue
These are the least bad things he would do
He was nasty, racist, arrogant and baseless
Afforded nice clothes but his taste was tasteless
Never before you seen a kid so graceless
Place the worst and claim he was the greatest
Grabbing at girls and causing distress
What a pest! Tried his hand up every vest and dress
And he’d never show respect unless you were white and rich and tell him that he was the best
A sensitive boy who’d never share his toys
Could dish out abuse but when received he’d get annoyed
And never let it lie til we’d concede then prance around smug at a jiggling speed

Then I saw him picking on this Pakistani kid
For no good reason and he was half as big
Giving him digs, this became bi-monthly
Telling him “Get the fuck out of my country”
So me and some lads found out where he lived
Scaled the wall and broke into his residence
Beat him to death with no fucks to give
If he’d lived, right now that chump would be president


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