A Night in the Life of

Wife’s elbow jabbing into the V of my back
I’m sure the street light outside the window gets brighter every day
Filled up too late, belly aches from all the crap
Ankle’s punishing from a mission’s worth of strain

Baby Alice just learnt how to jump over the side of her bed
This is the fourth time I’ve told her to go back to her room
Bruce comes in to check if it’s correct what I’ve said
He wants to go downstairs with her and watch cartoons

“Both of you get out it’s 3 o’clock”
Tomorrow’s going to be a nightmare if I don’t get at least 6 hours
Wife suggests we fit their door with a security lock
But there’s no way either of their bladders has that much power

Matter of fact neither does mine, that’s another thing keeping me up
Plus a million ideas running through my mind be it a poem, song, article or book
But nothing that’s going to make money, sorry wife
Money, that’s another thing robbing the sleep out of my life

I’ll check my phone a bit, that’ll send me back to sleep
A bright light 3 inches from my face that connects me to the world
Anything interesting on FriendFace? Something to retweet?
Yeah that pisses me off too. Ooh she’s a lovely girl

“Hey, wife? You okay?” Squeeze her bum and kiss her hair
“I need to sleep, your kids are driving me crazy, go away!”
Try to feel sorry for myself. I guess she doesn’t care
But know full well I’m being a pest and what she was going to say

So now I am awake. And horny too.
Kids are being quiet. Left arm has gone numb
Just going to lie here? That all I can do?
Sod it just get up and go for a little run

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